HEADHUNTER

Bluto, Popeye.  Look.  You kids are driving me nuts.  You two always go out for the same job.  I don’t know how it happens.  I mean, it’s like I give one of you the listing and all of a sudden, next day, I have to clean up another PR nightmare when the other one shows up - and it doesn’t matter the industry.  I’ve made you guys moving men.  Rodeo performers.  Blacksmith workers.  I even tried to throw you shmucks through a loop by sending you on a fake call to be a sailor that, upon arrival, was just a beach with a spooky old boat on it with a sign reading “Ghost Ship - Beware.” I mean, frankly - do you guys even have all these skills?  Someone here is lying on their resume, I’ll tell you that right now.  And it’s not me.  Let’s look at my resume.  Headhunter. 1933 to present.  Before that, nothing other than an office manager at my dad’s law office in Cleveland.  Now let’s look at yours.  Lion tamer.  Scuba Man.  Human pair of buns.  Well, if you really did that job, you would be able to explain it.  Articulate it to me.  Speak up, Popeye!

Okay.  I need to drink some water.  Okay.

I have a new lead.  It’s for one singular volunteer firefighter.  NOT so fast Bluto - you two have to promise me that when I give this to one o’ you, the other ain’t gonna show up an’ yuk it up, ok?  Okay?  Shake on it.  Alright.  Now get outta here.  Beat it.  Bring me back my percentage.

(door closes) (to secretary)

They can’t screw up a burning building, right?

SECRETARY (overlapping)

You should start-

HEADHUNTER (overlapping)

I should start calling places.